Suicide pt. 2

911 arrived within a matter of 5 minutes, if that. His parents arrived right after them. I remember guiding them to where he was. The EMT’s ran to him. They cut his clothes off of him, Gave him 4 adrenaline shots, I remember trying not to go over by him. Terrified, just heart shattered. I could see what they were doing, they put him on a stretcher. The police started asking me questions, what happened, etc. I remember his mom just hugging me, crying. Petrified, you can only imagine what she felt in that moment. My heart broke for her. My heart still breaks for her every time I think of this night. She’s such a strong woman, and a woman of god. His grandparents showed up, when they heard and some people were going in and outside of the house. I was in the kitchen talking with his mom when the EMT woman came to mrs. Sharon and told her that at that time they were breathing for her son. I was so pissed, enraged. I knew that wasn’t what mrs. Sharon wanted to hear, or anyone for that matter. 
I remember I wanted to smack the EMT. But it wasn’t her fault, she was doing her job. I was still in a traumatic state of mind.. the EMT’s told us Will was indeed dead when I cut him down, and that I brought him back to consciousness/life. Even though they were breathing for him, his heart rate was regaining strength. They decided to transfer him to a local hospital, when on their way there they couldn’t get a tube down his throat. He just so happened to bite his tongue and his tongue was so swollen they couldn’t make it down his throat, so they then made an emergency decision to bring him to A trauma hospital in New Orleans. I was asked if I wanted to go, I denied my invitation. Not because I didn’t care, not because I didn’t want to be right by his side when he woke up, but because my mind literally could not understand what happened. I didn’t think it would be good for me to go after what I just saw, I was scared. I was scared to see him in that hospital bed, I was scared to get results back, I was just simply put, flat out terrified of everything at that point. Everyone left, the EMT, the police, fire department, his family went with him to the hospital.. his neighbors were outside and I still hadn’t gotten a hold of anyone. I asked to use there phone. I remember all I wanted was to get a hold of my dad. 

I just wanted my dad to come get me and hold me. I know that sounds so stupid. Growing up I was closer to my dad than my mom,so my first thought was where is my dad. I called and called and didn’t get any answer. So I ended up calling my mom, she answered. I remember crying just begging her to come get me. I COULD NOT STAY AT HIS HOUSE ALONE. ESPECIALLY ON THIS NIGHT. I told her what happened and she came to get me, and I begged her to bring me to my dad and step moms but we couldn’t get them on the phone so she just brought me to her house. I was a mess. An utter mess. I was zoned out, when I would zone back in I’d barely speak. I was angry, sad, scared, hurt. you name it, I felt it. When we got their my aunt and uncle were there waiting for us. I’ve never seen my uncle cry this way. He couldn’t believe what just happened. He was proud of me and worried about Will all at the same time.. we finally got in touch with my dad, he was at a concert in Mississippi when I tried calling. When we told them what happened they came to my moms right away. I remember Wills grandpa calling me asking me all these questions. “How long was he hanging” “how long until you noticed?” “Did he say anything after you cut him down ?” I had no clue. I remember getting rude kind of like how do you expect me to remember these things? I don’t know. I answered his questions the best I couldn’t. He was asking for the doctors dealing with Will. The whole ordeal probably lasted a few minutes, but to me it felt like an hour. They were trying to figure out if Will would have brain damage, memory loss, etc. 

I tried answering their questions as best I could, but a few minutes feels like hours when you go through things like that.. thank the good lord Will had no brain damage, or memory damage. He doctors said I cut him down just in time. If he would have been up there for a few more seconds his outcome could have been different.. I was so thankful.. I could swear he was up there for ten minutes, still till this day, but he wasn’t. I’m so glad that god gave me the courage to think quickly and give me the courage I needed to save Will. 

Still I Rise

Kirsten

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s